DRUGS

We're on drugs. Kids, athletes, adults, retirees, the nation--the world--is on drugs.

For today's teenager, the drug of choice is prescription drugs, primarily pain killers (right alongside inhalants, alcohol, marijuana and cough syrup).

We've been told recently that studies show that alcohol is good for you. A glass or two of red wine has multiple health benefits. At the same time, 40% of driving deaths over the holidays can be attributed to the effects of alcohol.

We see ad after ad on television for drugs that help us sleep, lose weight, lower cholestrol, lower anxiety, even if possible side effects include nausea, dizziness, diarreah, limb loss or death.

When we see the doctor, what we probably don't hear about is the multitude of drug company representatives who visited the office to "heighten awareness" of new drugs coming on the market, and why he/she should begin prescribing them to patients. True, drugs make money for street pushers; they also make LOTS of money for doctors, wholesalers, drug companies, researchers and shareholders.

Don't get me wrong--many drugs are necessary and beneficial to our standard of living. (What would I do without Claritin for my allergies?!?) But like anything, when used in excess instead of moderation (and I believe as a society we've crossed that line), things spiral out of control.

As a middle school counselor for 500 students in San Bernardino, I deal with some type of drug issue on a weekly, if not daily, basis. And, if it's not the student, it's the parent, the sibling--sometimes, yes, the teacher--who has dependency or abuse issues.

A few weeks before our "winter" break (ever the rebel, I always refer to it as our Christmas vacation--go ahead, fire me) I talked with an 8th grade boy who was struggling with parents who were constantly fighting, and alcohol seemed to be the drink of choice in the household. I asked him how he dealt with his parents' drinking and yelling, and he said he smoked weed. It helped him "tune out" the pain and chaos he simply could not escape.

When we return from break, I plan on including him in one of my support groups. But for the life of me, I simply could not find the words--or the justification--to explain to him that he shouldn't be smoking weed. Seriously, his parents are old enough to go to the store and buy their drug of choice that helps them numb whatever pain they're experiencing. Mom or dad aren't in any frame of mind to realize how their discord is negatively affecting their son. So he does the best he can with what he has. This is a good kid I'm talking about. A good kid trying to survive in a rotten situation.

Perhaps my not trying to talk him out of getting high makes me a rotten counselor . . .any suggestions?

A Few Good Men

Everybody has heroes, and they usually change as one travels through life. As a teenager, my hero was Pete Townshend (guitarist/songwriter of The Who). Jimmy Connors became one at some point. Bono will always be one to me. Interestingly, as I grow older, my heroes have become more down to earth--people who I actually know and interact with. I'm not exactly sure where the line crosses over from hero to idol--wouldn't want that to happen! But I feel it is important to have people we can look to and say, "Wow--if I could even have a fraction of the qualities exhibited in that person . . .".

My dentist is one of my heroes, and has been for decades. Not because he does root canals in my mouth . . .my dentist happens to be Dr. Rod Collins. He pastored Saturday Night Life at Calvary Chapel of Redlands and currently pastors Sanctuary Church in Beaumont. But it's not so much what he does, but who he is--and "how" he is, that makes him one of my heroes. (I'm sure he doesn't even know I have a blog, much less read it; if you happen to attend his church or dentist office, maybe it's best not to mention this to him--he might get freaked out or something.) Rod is my hero simply because he has mastery (as far as I can tell) over every area of his life: his family, his ministry, his profession, his relationships--God has given him great talents, and he has chosen to use them to the fullest. He exhibits consistency, integrity, passion, balance--the list is endless.

Another hero of mine is Dave Maupin. I have known Dave for over two decades, as well. He is a financial planner who lives and works in Redlands. But, much like Dr. Rod, what he "does" doesn't even begin to describe the breadth of this man's life. He started a campaign to raise funds for an AIDS orphanage in Africa, one which he has recently visited. Earlier this year, he handed me a book as I left his office, and just this week I finally took it off my shelf and read it. "Season of Life" by Jeffrey Marx is a true story about a high school football team. It has the potential to be a life-changing book (hint: it is not just about football). My only regret is not reading it sooner. Chances are I will be handing the book off to a few of my unsuspecting friends in the not too distant future. In fact, my next blog will probably be like a "mini review". Yes, it is that good.

Of course, Jesus is the ultimate hero; these are simply two of Jesus' modern day disciples.

Into the Wild

Last week I was talking with an 8th grade boy in my office. He was from the "Opportunity" class, which basically means, "Ok, you've got one last opportunity before you're outta here". I asked him how his weekend was, and he proceeded to tell me that he went snowboarding. For some reason (perhaps because it was such a rare response to that question) his words really threw me. "Really--where did you go? Who did you go with?" He said he went to Big Bear with his older brother. What was interesting about this was I had just recently read an article which once again supported the idea that inner-city youth who are given an opportunity to experience non-city settings (i.e. beach, desert, mountains) have a much greater chance of "beating the odds". I remember leaning forward and saying something like, "You need to grab every opportunity to go up to Big Bear. It's really good for you." Something tells me he already knew that . . . .

My favorite movie of the year, by far, is "Into the Wild", written and directed by Sean Penn. It is based on the bestselling book of the same name, and basically chronicles the true life adventure of Chris McCandless, who disappeared into the Alaskan Wilderness 15 years ago with little more than the clothes on his back and, at the time, an empty journal. He was never heard from again (only his journal survived). I highly recommend this fascinating yet tragic story of a young man trying to find (lose?)himself--both the book and the movie are exceptionally well done (I believe the movie is still playing at Ontario Mills--worth the drive!).

As a boy, my family would spend a week at church camp every summer near Running Springs. As a youth leader, nearly every winter or summer retreat we would end up in the mountains. Even as a teacher, I have had invaluable opportunities to backpack in the High Sierras or camp in the mountains with groups of student leaders. Now, vacationing in the forest isn't enough--I really want to live there full-time, and can see that happening in the next few years. The concrete jungle, the traffic, the smog, the heat are finally taking their toll, and have been for quite some time.

I marvel at how Jesus, after making some wine, preaching to the crowds or healing people, would just sort of disappear up into the hills. Well, I think I need to be more like Jesus . . . .

Christmas

December brings so many decisions, as far as how to celebrate Christmas. Some people probably have traditions that span generations and never change them--why would they?



I remember shortly after becoming a Christian in college, it really upset me that once Christmas was over, we would sort of "pack it up" and put everything back in the garage. "Why, I wondered, should we keep this going only one month out of the year? Isn't Christ's birth worth celebrating year-round?" So, what I did was, I kept the little plastic green tree I had had since I was a little boy with its mini-lights up and running until April. It was the year after I graduated from U of R, and I was living in my first apartment on La Paloma in Redlands. People thought it a bit strange when they would come over, but I didn't much care. Of course, after awhile, I caved in and, well, put it in the garage.



As the years go by, different decisions: in my office at school, what decorations would be appropriate (or inappropriate)? Should I purchase gifts in stores or on-line? Which is more impersonal, a gift card or a gift basket? Colored lights or white lights? Send snail mail cards, online cards or no cards? Should I host a Christmas party, or just continue to mooch off of other people's parties? This time of the year can get so weird so fast. We spend so much time with the "peripheral" trappings of the season, go into debt, get all stressed out and by the time it's over, can't WAIT to "pack it up" and shove it back into the garage. So what's the answer? What I pray for is balance. Of course, easier "prayed for" than done.



Christmas can also be an emotional time for many people. Perhaps it's the first year the kids are off to college, and won't be around for the holidays; perhaps someone is newly divorced,
and isn't sure how that's supposed to work; perhaps someone has recently lost a loved one, creating a "cloud" over Christmas (much like I've experienced since losing my Mom).

In the end, I believe Christmas is an extension of Thanksgiving. Even though the decorations might be in the garage most of the year, in my heart, I need to be forever mindful of how thankful I am not only for Christ and His coming, but also for the blessings He continues to shower upon me--my family, my friends, my church, my health--even my job (a "mixed blessing", as of late). Perhaps it is possible, after all, to celebrate the "spirit" of Christmas year round . . . .